Mirror Mirror On The Wall!
Uke is like a reflection of nage. His movements are the response to the actions of the nage.
I often tell students that Aikido is kinda like a nudist colony. The moment you get on the mat, you become "naked". All the good and bad, they all shows when you are on the aikido mat. There is nowhere to hide. For those who have watched Aikido practice, don't you agree that, after watching people in action for a few rounds, you already get a rough idea of what kind of person someone is? Not long after I started aikido, I realize it is possible to "read" the mental state of most people simply through a grip on the wrist -- whether I am the nage or uke.
Not only can one examine others through Aikido, but we can also inspect ourselves honestly. If we are up for it, Aikido offers a great opportunity for one to reflect and work on oneself. The better your uke is, the clearer a reflection he provides of you.
The trouble is, not everybody is ready to inspect themselves so closely and so candidly. We all prefer to see the good sides of ourselves as people. Isn't it normal for people to smile the moment a camera is pointed at them? Even when we are alone, more often than not, we break out a smile as we look into the mirror. As a result, when people see a less-than-desirable reflection of themselves at Aikido, some choose to blame the mirror. "Bad uke!" It is so easy to say. Some people get agitated enough to even beat on the mirror because the mirror does not offer a reflection that fits their preferred self-image.
There was a period of time when I got injuries all the time. One of my regular partners is a very strong, stocky man. Many times, he could not throw me with a technique and resorted to using muscles to get me down. It was not like he had absolutely no awareness. He knew he used brute force to knock me down. However, right afterwards, he always said to me, "Why are you doing this? You made me do it! I didn't mean to. You made me!" Really? How could I make him? I do not know I have the magical powerful to make people do things against their will. I was just a dumb kid who did not know how to fake anything, and not skillful enough to know how to cooperate. I was too slow to learn that, sometimes, you maybe better off going down yourself in order to not get hurt.
After years of being tossed around like a small bag of trash, I learned to be very set and very connected to the ground -- so much that I was more connected to the ground than I was with my partner! Most people found it hard to move me. They felt like they were shackled to the ground. I was just a short, skinny kid. Many got upset and even angry, thinking I was trying to be difficult. How would you explain the phenomenon, otherwise? Many people I encountered in seminars get mad at me within two rounds. A friend even commented: "You are so talented. You always manage to bring out the worst aspects of people you practice with." It was so upsetting: she made it sound like I asked for it. All I have done was what I considered an honest attack. I really did not know better.
I learned my lesson the hard way. As the saying goes, it always takes two. Both parties of an Aikido union has a part to play in the dynamics. Given what I have gone through, I advice students that if they do not like their reflection off the mirror, instead of beating and cussing at the damn mirror, perhaps what they should consider doing is to work on the object -- fix themselves to become better looking . . . and smile.
I often tell students that Aikido is kinda like a nudist colony. The moment you get on the mat, you become "naked". All the good and bad, they all shows when you are on the aikido mat. There is nowhere to hide. For those who have watched Aikido practice, don't you agree that, after watching people in action for a few rounds, you already get a rough idea of what kind of person someone is? Not long after I started aikido, I realize it is possible to "read" the mental state of most people simply through a grip on the wrist -- whether I am the nage or uke.
Not only can one examine others through Aikido, but we can also inspect ourselves honestly. If we are up for it, Aikido offers a great opportunity for one to reflect and work on oneself. The better your uke is, the clearer a reflection he provides of you.
The trouble is, not everybody is ready to inspect themselves so closely and so candidly. We all prefer to see the good sides of ourselves as people. Isn't it normal for people to smile the moment a camera is pointed at them? Even when we are alone, more often than not, we break out a smile as we look into the mirror. As a result, when people see a less-than-desirable reflection of themselves at Aikido, some choose to blame the mirror. "Bad uke!" It is so easy to say. Some people get agitated enough to even beat on the mirror because the mirror does not offer a reflection that fits their preferred self-image.
There was a period of time when I got injuries all the time. One of my regular partners is a very strong, stocky man. Many times, he could not throw me with a technique and resorted to using muscles to get me down. It was not like he had absolutely no awareness. He knew he used brute force to knock me down. However, right afterwards, he always said to me, "Why are you doing this? You made me do it! I didn't mean to. You made me!" Really? How could I make him? I do not know I have the magical powerful to make people do things against their will. I was just a dumb kid who did not know how to fake anything, and not skillful enough to know how to cooperate. I was too slow to learn that, sometimes, you maybe better off going down yourself in order to not get hurt.
After years of being tossed around like a small bag of trash, I learned to be very set and very connected to the ground -- so much that I was more connected to the ground than I was with my partner! Most people found it hard to move me. They felt like they were shackled to the ground. I was just a short, skinny kid. Many got upset and even angry, thinking I was trying to be difficult. How would you explain the phenomenon, otherwise? Many people I encountered in seminars get mad at me within two rounds. A friend even commented: "You are so talented. You always manage to bring out the worst aspects of people you practice with." It was so upsetting: she made it sound like I asked for it. All I have done was what I considered an honest attack. I really did not know better.
I learned my lesson the hard way. As the saying goes, it always takes two. Both parties of an Aikido union has a part to play in the dynamics. Given what I have gone through, I advice students that if they do not like their reflection off the mirror, instead of beating and cussing at the damn mirror, perhaps what they should consider doing is to work on the object -- fix themselves to become better looking . . . and smile.
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