A Stern Teacher; The Kindest Father
When your teacher truly believes in you, how can you not feel empowered and rise to the occasion? That was what my teacher Kenneth Cottier Sensei did for me. He always made me feel that I could do more and do better -- even though he sometimes scared me to tears simply by the way he said my name.
Many years ago on a Thursday, I, a carefree 5th kyu (yellow belt), went to practice as usual. When we had 30 minutes left for class, Sensei asked those who were planning on testing on Saturday to raise their hands. He walked down the line to see who was testing for what rank, and he stopped in front of me.
"Meipo, are you testing?" he asked. I was just sitting there contently doing nothing. A little startled, I looked at Sensei with a blank face, shook my head and mouthed "No." Somehow, Sensei did not move on. He asked me the same question again slightly louder, in a higher pitch voice, "Meipo, are you testing?" I was confused. I thought maybe Sensei did not get my answer. Therefore, I said out loud, "No, Sensei, I am not." But then, Sensei looked at me intently, and asked in a deeper and heavier voice, "Meipo, AREN'T YOU TESTING?" My sempai, Sampson Li, who was sitting on my left, grabbed my arm, raised it up high and said, "Yes, Sensei, she is now." Being young and stupid, I was totally floored. 😲
Sensei broke up the class based on our ranks and assigned different sempais to assist with our test review. Sensei, himself, was in charge of the group I was in. He came to me and said in a firm voice, "Miss Fun, show me Ushiro Ryokatatori Kotegaeshi." Every time Sensei wants to be stern with you, you have no first name anymore. He addresses you by Mr or Miss So and So. You hear him talk that way, you know you are in trouble.
Sure enough, I had absolutely no idea what technique he was talking about. I was scared. "I don't know, Sensei. I am sorry. " 😰 "You don't know? Miss Fun, you are supposed to test in two days!!! How can you not know your techniques???" He looked at me with some big, round, fierce eyes. I felt like I was going to melt in front of him. After all, I only found out I was going to be tested in two days about five minutes ago!
Fortunately, with some remedial help over the next 36 hours, I did well enough to pass the test. It was one of the most stressful experience I had had in my entire young, little life.
Sensei always has creative ways of making grading experiences educational and definitely memorable. Fast forward a couple years.
I was testing for 3rd kyu with three guys. To start, Sensei called out a bunch of junior yudanshas (black belts). We were wondering why we needed black belt ukes for our level. Since there were four of us, we could just pair up with each other. "Black belts, you are the nage. Please toss them around for a while. Any attack." The next thing you know, we took ukemi for about 10-15 minutes non-stop. Finally, Sensei clapped his hands and said, "Okay, That's good enough. They seem more relaxed now. We can start the test."
I was doing quite fine at the beginning when we were doing techniques standing. Then, Sensei called out suwari waza (seated techniques). For some reasons, the moment I sat down, all my Aikido vaporized from my body. My partner came to attack me; I sat there like a broken puppet. I did not know what to do. Very promptly, Sensei called me out on that, "What is wrong with you, Miss Fun? Do you know Aikido? How can you just sit there like this???" To be honest, I really wanted to tell him, "No, Sensei, all of a sudden, I don't know aikido anymore. I don't know what happened." But, of course, I didn't say that to my teacher. So, I dragged myself around clumsily for a long time, until my Aikido muse came back to me. I finished my test and passed at the end. I cannot quite recall what exactly happened, but I will never forget the look on my teachers face and his stern voice over me.
My stories might have given you the impression that Sensei was a harsh and mean person. If this is what you think, it cannot be further from the truth. Yes, he could be a strict and demanding teacher on the mat because he worked very hard to give everything he knew to us. Off the mat, he was the kindest and sweetest gentleman you can ever meet.
Since the first day I met him, Cottier Sensei always insisted on walking on the road side of the side walk because that is what a gentleman should do when walking with a lady. He never let me carry his gi bag for him once, although this is a rather normal deed for a student to do for his teacher. Needless to say, when I practiced with him, I knew he took a lot of care to make sure I did not get hurt while he continued to nudge me forward. He could toss me around in whatever way he wanted; I never felt afraid. Sensei always watched out for me.
Sensei was always kind to me. I do not remember one single time he said no to my requests. However, I did not get an immediate nod from him every single time. Sometimes I had to literally shake a yes out of him. "Please, Sensei, please," I would hold on to him and shake him as I made my plea. Many times, he would pretend to scream in an adorable voice, "Let go of me! Take your hands off of me! Let me go!" as he stood there "helplessly", totally not resisting. With a cute, happy smile on his face, he always said okay at the end.
It has been over ten years since Cottier Sensei's passing. Sensei dedicated his life to promoting Aikido and serving the aikido community. There is not one day I do not think of him and what he has done for us. I do not think I can ever be like him, but I would try my best to emulate him as a teacher so as to pass down the gift that he has given to me.
Many years ago on a Thursday, I, a carefree 5th kyu (yellow belt), went to practice as usual. When we had 30 minutes left for class, Sensei asked those who were planning on testing on Saturday to raise their hands. He walked down the line to see who was testing for what rank, and he stopped in front of me.
"Meipo, are you testing?" he asked. I was just sitting there contently doing nothing. A little startled, I looked at Sensei with a blank face, shook my head and mouthed "No." Somehow, Sensei did not move on. He asked me the same question again slightly louder, in a higher pitch voice, "Meipo, are you testing?" I was confused. I thought maybe Sensei did not get my answer. Therefore, I said out loud, "No, Sensei, I am not." But then, Sensei looked at me intently, and asked in a deeper and heavier voice, "Meipo, AREN'T YOU TESTING?" My sempai, Sampson Li, who was sitting on my left, grabbed my arm, raised it up high and said, "Yes, Sensei, she is now." Being young and stupid, I was totally floored. 😲
Sensei broke up the class based on our ranks and assigned different sempais to assist with our test review. Sensei, himself, was in charge of the group I was in. He came to me and said in a firm voice, "Miss Fun, show me Ushiro Ryokatatori Kotegaeshi." Every time Sensei wants to be stern with you, you have no first name anymore. He addresses you by Mr or Miss So and So. You hear him talk that way, you know you are in trouble.
Sure enough, I had absolutely no idea what technique he was talking about. I was scared. "I don't know, Sensei. I am sorry. " 😰 "You don't know? Miss Fun, you are supposed to test in two days!!! How can you not know your techniques???" He looked at me with some big, round, fierce eyes. I felt like I was going to melt in front of him. After all, I only found out I was going to be tested in two days about five minutes ago!
Fortunately, with some remedial help over the next 36 hours, I did well enough to pass the test. It was one of the most stressful experience I had had in my entire young, little life.
Sensei always has creative ways of making grading experiences educational and definitely memorable. Fast forward a couple years.
I was testing for 3rd kyu with three guys. To start, Sensei called out a bunch of junior yudanshas (black belts). We were wondering why we needed black belt ukes for our level. Since there were four of us, we could just pair up with each other. "Black belts, you are the nage. Please toss them around for a while. Any attack." The next thing you know, we took ukemi for about 10-15 minutes non-stop. Finally, Sensei clapped his hands and said, "Okay, That's good enough. They seem more relaxed now. We can start the test."
I was doing quite fine at the beginning when we were doing techniques standing. Then, Sensei called out suwari waza (seated techniques). For some reasons, the moment I sat down, all my Aikido vaporized from my body. My partner came to attack me; I sat there like a broken puppet. I did not know what to do. Very promptly, Sensei called me out on that, "What is wrong with you, Miss Fun? Do you know Aikido? How can you just sit there like this???" To be honest, I really wanted to tell him, "No, Sensei, all of a sudden, I don't know aikido anymore. I don't know what happened." But, of course, I didn't say that to my teacher. So, I dragged myself around clumsily for a long time, until my Aikido muse came back to me. I finished my test and passed at the end. I cannot quite recall what exactly happened, but I will never forget the look on my teachers face and his stern voice over me.
My stories might have given you the impression that Sensei was a harsh and mean person. If this is what you think, it cannot be further from the truth. Yes, he could be a strict and demanding teacher on the mat because he worked very hard to give everything he knew to us. Off the mat, he was the kindest and sweetest gentleman you can ever meet.
Since the first day I met him, Cottier Sensei always insisted on walking on the road side of the side walk because that is what a gentleman should do when walking with a lady. He never let me carry his gi bag for him once, although this is a rather normal deed for a student to do for his teacher. Needless to say, when I practiced with him, I knew he took a lot of care to make sure I did not get hurt while he continued to nudge me forward. He could toss me around in whatever way he wanted; I never felt afraid. Sensei always watched out for me.
Sensei was always kind to me. I do not remember one single time he said no to my requests. However, I did not get an immediate nod from him every single time. Sometimes I had to literally shake a yes out of him. "Please, Sensei, please," I would hold on to him and shake him as I made my plea. Many times, he would pretend to scream in an adorable voice, "Let go of me! Take your hands off of me! Let me go!" as he stood there "helplessly", totally not resisting. With a cute, happy smile on his face, he always said okay at the end.
It has been over ten years since Cottier Sensei's passing. Sensei dedicated his life to promoting Aikido and serving the aikido community. There is not one day I do not think of him and what he has done for us. I do not think I can ever be like him, but I would try my best to emulate him as a teacher so as to pass down the gift that he has given to me.
Photo Credit: Tim Gion, movestill.com
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