Too Much Of A Good Thing
"We had usually go get a bite to eat and, perhaps, a beer with students after Aikido practice on Fridays," I shared our routine with my brother who is a TCM doctor. "Don't drink so much beer! It is bad for your health." the doctor warned us in no time.
"We had eggplants from our garden for dinner tonight," I told my mom excitedly. "Don't eat so many eggplants! Eating too many eggplants gives you fuzzy eyesight!" Mama jumped in right away. "How many eggplant is too many? By the time I have eaten too many, I will be old enough to have presbyopic, fuzzy eyes anyways." I teased back.
One drink a week. Not that we are alcoholic or that we drink till we are wasted. And then a couple of eggplants when the garden produces enough fruit for a dish. Why do they immediately make it sound like we might be binging on eggplants or drinking beer excessively?
At a neighborhood meeting, people were discussing how to deal with dieback of oak trees because of tree borers. "With climate change, our native trees may not be able to make it even with preventive spraying," one neighbor noted. Another neighbor chimed in, "We cannot change the environment for the existing trees. They eventually may all die. Perhaps we should consider a long term plan, like planting new trees that can handle the new extreme wet/ dry weather better . . ." This suggestion started a spirited discussion among the crowd. "With climate change, some original native plants are no longer suited for this region. We should consider all possibilities, including non-natives, so that we can fill the gaps among the natives as we maintain our woodland ecology." Suddenly, a neighbor jumped up and stated in a loud voice, "Native plants are always superior to non-natives. No non-native plants should be planted. Birds and insects do not like non-natives."
Cricket. Cricket.
People looked around at each other, not knowing what to say. We were dumbstruck by the ardent response by this person. It is hard to miss the message that this neighbor has a very strong opinion about native vs non-native plants. We were only brainstorming as a group. Who said that we will not use native plants, or that we will replace all our native trees with non-natives?
And then, I realize extremism is everywhere . . . including the dojo.
At Aikido practice, verbally, we provide explanations to what we are demonstrating. We also go around class to make corrections for individual students.
"More extension!" All of a sudden, everybody becomes rigid with locked elbows.
"Gotta use all dimensions. Remember to use the vertical dimension, too!" In no time, people start bobbing and hopping around.
I once have a discussion with a counsellor friend about my observations. She laughed heartily. "This is what we call 'All Or Nothing' thinking! It is not a healthy behavior, but is very common. You gotta remind them there are many numbers between 0 and 100. 34, 82. 65 -- they are all good numbers for different situations!"
Aikido instructors do not only teach some physical moves. We are there to help change lives one at a time. To do our job well, I learn that, we seriously have to watch every word we use. Gambatte, fellow Aikido instructors. And students, for your own good, please try not to be an extremist.
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