Enjoy It While You Can

During practice, I spotted that a pair of students was standing still.  "Why aren't they moving and practicing like others?"  Upon inspection, I found that the more senior student, instead of attacking and allowing his partner to attempt the technique, was trying to correct the junior student verbally on multiple things.  Unfortunately, the junior student -- a relatively new one -- was unable to comprehend and comply with the sempai's well-intended instructions.  Practice stalled.

"Leave him alone.  Just attack and let him try." I intervened.  The senior student complied.  Since this was the first time for this junior student to see and do hanmi-handachi (respond from a seated position to a standing attacker) techniques, he had a hard enough time just to figure out his hands and feet.  Although he entangled himself into a pretzel, he was making progress through the struggle, learning and having fun along the way.

After class, the senior student apologized for his actions on the mat.  "Apology accepted." I smiled.  "Do you know why I told you to leave him be?"  He pondered for a second and said, "He could not deal with so many things."  "Exactly!  I understand you meant well, but you need to have reasonable expectations.  You kept asking a beginner to make fine adjustments to his movements.  This is the first time he tried this.  If he were capable of handling such fine details, would he still be a beginner?"  We both laughed.

This incident makes me think of the time when I was under my teachers tutelage: Sometimes I wondered why sensei would come to correct me on things that I did, but said nothing to my partners who were doing even worse than I was.  Some partners smirked triumphantly when sensei was correcting me, as if they were so perfect and only I had problems.  It felt so unfair.  "Why did sensei single me out???" I was puzzled.

Now, of course, I have learnt to only ask a student to fix something when I think he is capable of handling it.  When someone is not capable of managing even the fundamental elements, I am not going to demand that they fix the little things.   I have to make corrections according to one's abilities.  If I ask too much of a student, he may become so overwhelmed and distracted that we achieve nothing.  Therefore, if the teacher comes to you for fine tuning, it can be an indication that you have demonstrated the ability to do more.  Believe it or not, it is a form of praise.

"Please remember that correcting other students is not your job.  Your only job is to pay the best attention and reproduce what you see.  Teaching another student is not your responsibility.  That's why we have instructors.  Leave it to the teachers.  Focus on your own practice." I reminded the student.  Proper etiquette is very important.  It is the instructors' job to teach students how to behave, particularly when they visit other dojos or attend seminars.  

"Have you heard of this Buddhist teaching?  If you want to take someone across the sea, you have to be able to get to the other side first.  If you cannot handle the swim and/or do not know your way, you are just going to get both of you drowned.  So, the priority of your study is to get yourself there first."  He nodded.

"I understand the urge to say something to your partners, but just leave it to them and your instructors.  One day when you look back, you will realize how comfortable it is to be a student because you can simply practice your own practice.  You do not have to carry anybody else.  The day will come when you are tasked with helping others.  When you step on the mat and you have to observe everybody and think about who needs what and constantly have to think about how to help the different individuals, it is harder than swimming with your clothes on.  Enjoy what you have now.  Being a student is wonderful."

Read [Other Side Of Sea]