Patientez, SVP
Our friend, Chuck, once said I am the most impatient person in the world because every time I learn something, I want to be very good at it right away. He is right: I set my eyes high, and I (unreasonably) compare myself to people who are very experienced in it. I wish I could do what they do yesterday.
To the contrary, my friend, Michiko, thinks that I am the most patient person in the world. When I first met Michiko, we were both living on a campus in France. She wanted to improve her conversational English. Of all the people on campus, including native English speakers, somehow, she picked me to be her tutor.
Michiko is a very talented fashion designer. However, I must admit, her talent in languages is seriously not on par with her other skills. One time, we made a sentence together and I asked her to repeat the whole thing to me. I cannot recall what exactly it was, but it was something simple like "I am a Japanese living in France." For some reasons, she just cannot retain the entire thing in her head. "I am Japanese in France." "I am a Japanese France." "I Japanese live in France." Hmmm. She just kept finding ways of dropping something. At the end, it took 53 tries before she got the whole thing down. She broke out laughing hysterically multiple times. She got so mad at herself that she was pounding on the table. She buried her face in her hands and screamed. I just sat there to watch her with a smile.
"Meipo-san!!!! Even I am angry with me. How can you just sit there and smile?" said my adorable student. I told her it was my job to teach her. I could see she was trying very hard already. I wish I could do it for her. It would have been so easy. However, I cannot. All I can do is to be there with her, support her and cheer her along. At the end, she did it. It is good enough for me.
Fast forward a number of years. One evening, Jolie, our former Aikido student, came to watch class after she finished teaching a piano class for adult beginners. She looked exhausted. As I came to find out, her students had a hard time playing "Mary had a Little Lamb". So, she just spent an entire evening playing this lovely classic tune over and over.
"Meipo-san, how can you come to teach aikido day in day out, week after week like this? Although I am a student, even I can see people are not doing what you are doing. Doesn't it get to you?"
Jolie's question brought a smile to my face. She just reminded me that I used to ask Sensei the exact same question! I remember thanking and apologizing to Sensei after class many, many times. "I am sorry, Sensei. I already tried my best. Thank you for your patience." As always, Sensei would look at me with a smile that is filled with love and understanding. He nods his head and says, "Yeah, I know. It's okay."
I have been teaching in various capacities since I was in high school. Being an instructor teaches me way more than the material in question. I learn that every person is different, so they learn differently at different paces. If they already know it, or they can do it on their own, they would not need me. If it only requires one take for people to get everything, there is nothing call "review" or "practice". Learning takes time. It is a process.
I told Jolie that if I focused on result, I probably would have gone crazy long time ago. I try to focus on effort. If a student already has done his best, what else can I ask for? Asking for more is simply being unreasonable. I do my best, students do their best. That is good enough for me. The only time when I get upset with someone is when he takes my "gift" lightly and would not even bother to apply himself to learn.
The teacher can try to teach you, but the student has to learn. It is a partnership. I have to admit: teachers are not saints. As mortals, sometimes, we can get aggravated and frustrated, too. However, usually, it has nothing to do with the students. We just wish we could do better as teachers. We are also learning. We are trying to be better teachers for you. So, please bear with us. It is a process after all.
To the contrary, my friend, Michiko, thinks that I am the most patient person in the world. When I first met Michiko, we were both living on a campus in France. She wanted to improve her conversational English. Of all the people on campus, including native English speakers, somehow, she picked me to be her tutor.
Michiko is a very talented fashion designer. However, I must admit, her talent in languages is seriously not on par with her other skills. One time, we made a sentence together and I asked her to repeat the whole thing to me. I cannot recall what exactly it was, but it was something simple like "I am a Japanese living in France." For some reasons, she just cannot retain the entire thing in her head. "I am Japanese in France." "I am a Japanese France." "I Japanese live in France." Hmmm. She just kept finding ways of dropping something. At the end, it took 53 tries before she got the whole thing down. She broke out laughing hysterically multiple times. She got so mad at herself that she was pounding on the table. She buried her face in her hands and screamed. I just sat there to watch her with a smile.
"Meipo-san!!!! Even I am angry with me. How can you just sit there and smile?" said my adorable student. I told her it was my job to teach her. I could see she was trying very hard already. I wish I could do it for her. It would have been so easy. However, I cannot. All I can do is to be there with her, support her and cheer her along. At the end, she did it. It is good enough for me.
"Meipo-san, how can you come to teach aikido day in day out, week after week like this? Although I am a student, even I can see people are not doing what you are doing. Doesn't it get to you?"
Jolie's question brought a smile to my face. She just reminded me that I used to ask Sensei the exact same question! I remember thanking and apologizing to Sensei after class many, many times. "I am sorry, Sensei. I already tried my best. Thank you for your patience." As always, Sensei would look at me with a smile that is filled with love and understanding. He nods his head and says, "Yeah, I know. It's okay."
I have been teaching in various capacities since I was in high school. Being an instructor teaches me way more than the material in question. I learn that every person is different, so they learn differently at different paces. If they already know it, or they can do it on their own, they would not need me. If it only requires one take for people to get everything, there is nothing call "review" or "practice". Learning takes time. It is a process.
I told Jolie that if I focused on result, I probably would have gone crazy long time ago. I try to focus on effort. If a student already has done his best, what else can I ask for? Asking for more is simply being unreasonable. I do my best, students do their best. That is good enough for me. The only time when I get upset with someone is when he takes my "gift" lightly and would not even bother to apply himself to learn.
The teacher can try to teach you, but the student has to learn. It is a partnership. I have to admit: teachers are not saints. As mortals, sometimes, we can get aggravated and frustrated, too. However, usually, it has nothing to do with the students. We just wish we could do better as teachers. We are also learning. We are trying to be better teachers for you. So, please bear with us. It is a process after all.
Comments
Post a Comment