Success

At a young age, a young man aspired to work up the corporate ladder to become a successful man.  He picked financial management as his major and got into a prestigious firm as planned.  He worked hard and did really well.  Everything in his life seemed to be on track.

One day, he was called into his boss' office.  The boss delightedly announced the promotion of his brilliant protégé to be a junior partner of the firm.  

Armed with such great news, the young man returned to his office, closed the door and started sobbing.

"That was when I realized I was going to be grounded: I will never get to pursue my dreams.  I won't get to travel the way I always wanted to.  I will not take risks anymore because I will be married to this job, this income and this lifestyle," says the young man.  "I am going to become my boss.  But I don't even admire him.  I don't want to become him!!!"

The young man packed up his stuff, got into the elevator for the garage, hopped into his car and never came back.

That is a pretty dramatic story of someone's epiphany and how he decided to take a U turn from a life he does not want.  He is probably not the only one faced with such a prospect, but very few people mange to fend off the temptations of a rich, material life for a quest for happiness that is marked with uncertainties and instability.  

I have many friends who are successful executives.  They work long hours and travel a lot.  When the children of our peers are graduating from college, quite a few of them have not yet found time for a relationship.  A lady friend lamented, "I don't get to date often.  But when I do, I am very hesitant to tell my date what kind of work I do.  I fear they might be gold diggers preying on desperate older women like me!"  Another friend confessed, "The last time I met someone, it was on a plane!  What are the chances?  How many flights do you have to take for that to happen?"

When I was young, I also felt the pressure and expectation to become "successful".  After all, my family pushed me through school with our very limited resources.  I could not let them down.  I remember standing in front of the TV, watching a woman accountant being interviewed.  "To be successful, do I have to become like her?  One out of how many accountants get to be at her level?  What do I have to do to get there?"  I felt so helpless and hopeless because my chances were so slim.  It felt like I was destined to become a failure.

A friend of mine, unlike me, made it to being a partner of an accounting firm.  When she found out what I ended up doing with my life, to my surprise, her response was: "Wow!  That sounds like so much fun.  I wish I could do the same, but I can never leave my job.  With my currently lifestyle, my mortgage and my car loan, I need the money.  It is not an option for me . . ."  

Young people, particularly those who come from humble backgrounds, understandably, yearn for wealth and fame.  To convince them otherwise, some say, isn't it like trying to tell someone who is starving the benefits of dieting?

What I am actually advocating is that, just like with food, it is really a bad idea to stuff your face and binge-eat.